Secrets in Life
by iwishiwerebellaswan
Summary: Bella moves to Forks with her 'half-brother' who is only 4 months old. She doesn't speak often but her lab partner makes it difficult for her to ignore him. When she winds up in hospital her closest secret is revealed. All Human.
1. Introduction

**Hey Guys,**

 **I know it has been a long time since I** **'ve posted anything. I've been working on a couple different stories and remembered this one. It was a story I started two years ago and I've just finished it off. Hope you like it**

 **-x-**

 **iwishiwherebellaswan**

 **xxx**

 **Secrets in Life**

 **Bella moves to Forks with her half-brother who'd only 4 months old. She doesn't speak often but her lab partner makes it difficult for her to ignore him. When she winds up in hospital more than one secret is revealed. All Human.**

 **Introduction**

 _Third Person_

The whole town was abuzz with thoughts and rumours about the two new residents. Chief Swan had been telling anyone and everyone about his daughter coming home with her baby half-brother. He'd been devastated when his wife had left and taken their daughter with her almost 18 years ago. After a while he learnt to live with it and when he attended her wedding to Phil, he saw how happy she was with him.

There was no chance for him and Renee, as long as she was happy, he was happy. That's how their love worked but it didn't go further than that. He realised that it was better for everyone that she left when she did, instead of staying in the arguments. The result was their daughter being happy. Although she still went through the normal struggles in life that everyone faces.

Now she was coming to Forks from Arizona and her life would be dramatically different. She knew it would but never thought how hard everything would be.


	2. New Start

**New Start**

 _Bella's POV_

My life had fallen apart. Everything had gone downhill since a year ago. I lost all my friends. I lost respect, trust and confidence. All I had now was my family. My small, but loving family. Forks offered me a new start, so I took it. The move wouldn't help with my confidence, but people would respect and trust me.

I couldn't leave my uhhh… baby brother, my mom wasn't enough of a mom for anyone and she could see that he was better off with me instead of her. Edward is an angel most of the time. He loves meeting new people and trying new things.

A wail brought my attention to the little boy strapped on my lap. People's eyes went to me as they shifted in their seats. The plane was cramped and full.

"It's okay Ed. We're nearly there. I know you don't like it but it's nearly over. I've got you baby."

I lifted him up and cradled him to my chest. His cries disturbed the sleeping man beside us who grunted and turned away from us. Comforting the beautiful boy in my arms, he soon quieted down and fell asleep.

Once the plane landed and everyone started getting off, I sat still so that I didn't get in the way of those around me. It was a difficult task juggling the sleeping Edward and grabbing my rucksack from the overhead bins. It was even more difficult dragging my suitcase off the carousel. Cradling Ed to my chest with one arm, I pulled the suitcase behind me as I made my way to the oversized baggage. After giving over my receipt, I was handed Ed's baby seat.

Making sure he was secured into the seat, it was easier to manage everything. I walked from the arrivals gate to be greeted by my dad, Charlie Swan, Chief of Police in Forks. He took my case from me and gave me a one armed hug, trying not to disturb the sleeping baby. Whilst he put my bag into the trunk of his cruiser, I removed Edward from his seat and held him in my arms in the passenger seat.

He'd woken up as I moved him and reached his hand out to touch my face. I bent down so that he could grab my nose and we both chuckled. His was a feather light tinkling noise that I loved to hear. The driver door opened, and my Dad climbed in. He saw Ed's sparkling eyes and a smile broke out across his face.

"Hey there little Ed. You looking forward to seeing your new home?"

The little boy in question turned his head to him and clapped his hands laughing.

"How's he been doing Bells? He's a lot bigger than when I last saw him."

"He's been doing really well. The doctor said that he's at a good size and weight for his age. He's been really keen to roll around. He can't crawl or move around yet, which makes it easier to keep an eye on him."

"How are you doing Bells? You coping alright?"

We were racing down the empty interstate because it was a Monday and I took a deep breath. How was I doing? Was I excited about moving in with my Dad? Was I happy about moving to Forks? Was I going to miss Arizona?

I'd definitely miss the sun and heat. I wouldn't miss anything else about Arizona. I wouldn't say I was happy about moving to Forks but I was glad I could have a new start and be with my Dad. He'd protect me and be there for me.

"I'm fine Dad. It's not about me though, is it? It's about Ed."

"You have to feel safe and comfortable too Bella. You've been through a lot."

"I know."

The car became silent as I stared down at the baby boy in my arms. He looked a lot like me with a tuft of brown hair and deep chocolate brown eyes. His nose was the same shape as Renee's and mine. His lips were different than mine though.

Looking up, I saw a familiar two bedroom house standing before me. In the drive was small car. I'd been looking to buy a car so knew what it was. I didn't think Charlie would buy a car for me though. There stood a deep blue ford focus.

"You bought a new car?"

"It's for you Bells. Your Mom said you'd been looking to get one, so I got you one. Is it alright?"

"I love it Dad. You didn't need to get one though. I've saved up the money for one."

"I know Bells. You should save it up though. You'll need it in the future so if you ever need anything, don't be scared to ask. I'd be happy to buy things for you and Edward."

All I did was nod and climb out of the car. I was thankful I'd wrapped little Ed in a thick winter coat because I stepped out into the freezing temperature January brought to Forks.

"It's a sturdy car with as many safety features I could get on it. I wanted to make sure you both were safe when getting around."

Throwing an arm around his neck, I gave him a hug, watching Edward between us.

"I love it Dad. Thanks."

He patted my back before I pulled back and turned to the car. Holding Ed up, he stared at the new car and reached his hands to the car. I moved us forwards as he tried to clutch the flat window. A large smile took over my face as he frowned.

"Ahhh, baby, you can't hold that."

I held my finger out for him to grab and he pulled it to his mouth. His teeth had yet to come through, but his gums were swollen and painful.

"Do you like the car Ed?"

He giggled and clapped his hand around my finger before sucking on my finger again. Recently, he'd taken to making a chewing motion with his mouth.

I turned around to see Charlie carrying the baby seat into the house before leaning against the door frame watching me. Pulling my finger from Edward's mouth, I turned him round to face me and started bouncing him. It was getting frosty, so I quickly ran up the steps and into the warm house.

It looked exactly the same as when I'd last seen it. Charlie was never one for design or decoration. I'd like to at least put some more recent photos up.

Lifting my suitcase that he'd brought in, Charlie led me up to my room. As there was only two bedrooms, Edward would be in with me. I stood in the doorway of my room and saw an old wooden crib against the wall.

"This was your crib when you lived here. I kept it because I couldn't bear to get rid of it."

I gave him a small smile and felt a little awkward. It wasn't Charlie's fault Renee left him. She just couldn't stand the town and for that he suffered the loss of both of us.

"I'll leave you two to get settled. We can just order a pizza tonight if you want Bells, and I got some of that milk formula you told me about."

"Thanks Dad."

He left the room and closed the door behind him. My new life was starting, and I had to take everything that I was given because it wouldn't get much better.


	3. Esme Cullen

**Esme Cullen**

After a long evening, I managed to get Edward asleep and laying in his new crib. I collapsed into my own bed and fell asleep quickly. At 2 o'clock in the morning I was awoken by the cries of a baby in pain. I scooped him into my arms and cradled him to me as I grabbed a bottle of medicine from my bedside desk. Carefully climbing down the stairs, I bounced him in my arms and tried to sooth him.

"It's okay baby. I've got you. I know baby. I know it hurts but I'm getting you some medicine. Shhhhh."

Of course he didn't quieten down. I made up a bottle of milk and put three drops of the medicine into the bottle before shaking it up. It took a while to get him to take the bottle, but he finally did.

"Bells? Is he okay?"

Turning around, I saw a worried Charlie standing in the kitchen doorway.

"Yeah. He's fine now Dad. It's just his gums flaring up. The doctor said that they would hurt for a while until his first few teeth have come through properly. It's hard to hear him in so much pain."

"I know Bells. You wouldn't want to wish pain on any baby."

He stepped forward and cupped the top of Edward's head and soothed his forehead with his thumb.

"How often do you do this?"

"Do what?"

"Get up in the middle of the night."

Looking up at his worried expression, I flicked my eyes straight back down to the fragile baby in my arms.

"Almost every night now. Between his gums hurting, him overheating and him being hungry, he's up most nights. There's not much you can do though. I don't mind though. I'd do anything for him."

"I know you would Bells."

We both watched Edward sucking on the bottle with his eyes closed until he'd finished. I placed the bottle down and held him up over my shoulder. After burping him I cradled him back in my arms and rocked him until he fell back asleep.

"He looks so much like you."

"I know."

"Beautiful."

My eyes flicked to his and he had a small smile on his face. This was the father I'd missed when I was growing up. He pecked my forehead and then Edward's before heading back to the stairs.

"Esme Cullen will be here at seven, so she can introduce herself. She's a very kind and caring woman so you don't need to worry about anything Bells. I trust her, so you can too."

"Okay Dad. Go get some more sleep."

"I'll see you in the morning Bells."

"You mean later?"

He chuckled slightly and nodded as he began to climb the stairs. I was left in the kitchen with a sleeping angel in my arms. School starts at 9 which is earlier than in Arizona and I was going to have to get used to it. It was a little daunting starting half way through the year let alone on a Tuesday.

By the time I got back to sleep, I only had another three hours of sleep on top of the three hours from earlier. I was up at 6:30, getting ready for the day and making a shopping list to get groceries after school.

Charlie was already downstairs when I went down and gave me my car keys and house keys. He'd also gotten me a doctor's note to excuse me from phys-ed, so I'd finish with fifth period at 3pm instead of at 4. He left soon after for work and I was left to a quiet house.

I wanted to get Edward ready for the day before Mrs Cullen arrived because that way I would feel safer leaving him with her all day. He didn't wake up when I was changing his diaper and I was glad. There was always a struggle to get him to sleep during the right hours as he would always wake in the middle of the night. Once I had him dressed though, he woke and squirmed about a little.

"Morning little Ed. Mrs Cullen is going to be caring for you today, so you need to be a good boy."

Tickling his tummy, he giggled and clapped his hands in front of his face. There was a knock on the front door and I lifted Edward into my arms. I slowly descended the stairs as I called out to the person at the door.

"I'm coming."

As I opened the door, I came face to face with beautifully pale woman with warm light brown eyes. Her face was heart shaped framed by caramel brown coloured hair. Smiling widely, her eyes lit up when she saw me, or more likely little Edward.

"I'm Esme Cullen. It's so nice to meet you Isabella."

I held my hand out for her to shake and she did but looked a little put out.

"It's just Bella. Come in Mrs Cullen."

"Please, call me Esme."

Nodding, I stepped back and let her step inside. She held her hands together as she took in the house. I closed the door and led her into the kitchen.

"Would you like something to eat? A drink?"

"A coffee would be nice."

"Sure."

Swinging Ed onto my hip, I set about making both of us coffee and making up a bottle of milk. She looked as though she wanted to say or do something but stopped herself and let me get on with it. When I'd given her a mug and poured mine into a flask, I sat at the small dining table with her. I waited until the little baby was drinking his milk before looking up at Esme.

"You're very good at this."

I automatically blushed and looked down.

"I have to be. Edward's only got me."

"My son's called Edward too. Well, I adopted him."

"I've always loved the name."

Looking up at her, I gave her a small smile.

"He's a good boy. I'd say he's quieter than most babies but when he wants something he'll be really loud. Once he's been fed he'll normally sleep afterwards but you need to wake him up after an hour. He'll never sleep at night otherwise. He's still on milk at the moment and the cupboards got enough for today. I'll get some more after school so will be home around 4. He takes a while to burp so you…"

"Bella?"

As I'd looked back down whilst talking, my eyes flicked up wide open.

"Calm down. Take a breath. Everything will be alright. I read the document you'd sent so I know what to do. I promise that little Edward will be perfectly fine when you come home."

I let out a breath I'd been holding and nodded. She was right. Everything would be fine, and I had to learn to trust. If Charlie could trust her then I could.

"Sorry. I've never been far from him for more than a couple of hours let alone a whole day of school."

"I understand Bella. You can ring at lunch if you want and I'll tell you everything we've done so far. I'll take pictures and send them to you throughout the day, so you can see that he's alright."

"No, it's okay Esme. I've just got to learn to trust you."

She nodded before sipping at her coffee. I looked down to see an empty bottle and a tired looking baby. Holding him over my shoulder, I started to burp him, and Esme watched carefully. When I'd finished, I cradled him back against my chest as he fell asleep.

"Can I hold him?"

I was reluctant to give him over but when I looked into her soft eyes, I nodded and held him out to her. Slowly, she took him into her arms and rocked him gently. With a hawk eye, I watched every move she made until she gave me a reassuring smile.

"It's okay Bella. If it becomes too much just let me know and I'll hand him back to you. I'm not going to push you too far on the first day."

"No, I'm fine. I trust you'll keep him safe."

"Why don't you get yourself ready for school?"

"Make yourself comfortable in the living room. If you want, at some point today lay him in a clump of cushions on the floor and you can explore to house. You can go in my room as most of Ed's things are in there too but the door furthest from the stairs is Charlie's and you can't go in there. Help yourself to the kitchen but there isn't much in there at the moment I'm afraid. Charlie seems to live off take out and the diner."

"I'll make do Bella. Don't worry about me."

Pecking Edward's forehead, I backed out of the kitchen and ran upstairs. All I had to do was tidy up a couple of things and grab my bag for school. I ran into the living room and stopped when I saw Esme cradling a sleeping Edward.

"As his teeth haven't come through yet, he likes to chew and suck things, especially fingers. If you don't want him to suck your fingers, give him one of the chew toys in his cradle upstairs and make sure he doesn't chew anything like stuffed animals or pillows. His immune systems not great so he's quite susceptible to illness."

"Okay. What about his gums? You said in your e-mail that his gums were hurting him."

"Yes. They don't usually during the day but if he is screaming a high pitched wail and crying, his gums are hurting. There's some medicine in the kitchen by the microwave. Put three drops in a bottle of milk shake it well and make sure he drinks as much as possible. It stops his gums from hurting but it also puts him to sleep. He'll wake up naturally after half an hour or so."

I sat down beside her and cupped the back of Edward's small head. Pressing another kiss to his forehead, I scooped him back into my arms as a lone tear fell from my eye. I stood with him in my arms and turned away from Esme. This moment was between Edward and me.

"I love you baby and I'll be back as soon as I can. Esme's going to look after you until I get back. I love you baby and I'll miss you."

After pecking his nose, I handed him back to Esme and turned away from them. If I looked at him again, I would never leave. I took a deep breath and lifted my bag.

"I'll see you later Esme."

"Have a good day Bella."

I grabbed my coffee and ran out of the house. I didn't trust Esme yet, but I had confidence that she would keep Ed safe. That was enough for now.


	4. Silence

**Silence**

It wasn't hard to find the school; you could find any place by driving down the one highway. The only thing that told me it was a high school was the sign out front. The premises consisted of a collection of identical houses with large numbers on the side to tell them apart. Trees and shrubs circle the property and conceal the true size of the school but even without seeing it, you could tell that it was small. What do you expect with a total of three hundred and fifty seven – now eight – students?

Everything was so different than Arizona. Instead of the yellows, golds and blues, the place was filled with soft greens and browns. It was a comfort to me as the enclosed feeling of anywhere you go gave me a form of protection.

Stepping from my safe haven in the form of a car, I made sure my hood was firmly pulled up over my head. I had no intentions of making friends here. I'd only be here till I'd graduated and then move far away. I didn't trust anyone. They'd all turn on me for some reason eventually.

All eyes were on me, or my car and then me. I realised why. All of the cars around me were old and tattered. Some were even vans. Mine was the newest by at least five years. Apart from one. In the corner closest to the school was a shiny, well-kept Volvo. As I walked past it, I saw XC60 on the back, but it didn't mean anything to me.

Whispers surrounded me until I stepped into the front office. I hadn't noticed how cold it was outside, but the temperature changed dramatically when the door closed behind me. The office was only small. There was a little waiting area with wood rimmed padded chairs. The floor was covered with an orange flecked carpet; notices and awards covering the walls and a large clock hung on the wall. As if there wasn't enough green outside, a cluster of potted plants were scattered around the office.

A long counter cut the room in half only to be cluttered with baskets of paper and brightly coloured flyers. Behind the desk stood three small desks, more tidy than the counter. A plump, red-haired woman wearing glasses sat by the tidiest of all desks. She was wearing a simple purple t-shirt and jeans. My worn out jeans and old hoodie felt out of place.

"Can I help you?"

I pulled my hood down and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I'm Isabella Swan."

Informing her of my name, her eyes lit up in recognition. She nodded and rifled through one of the paper filled baskets.

"Here's your schedule and a map of the school. I got your doctor's note for gym, so you are welcome to leave after 5th period."

"Thank you."

I took the papers from her and pulled my hood back up as I left the office. It had started raining outside and the parking lot was empty. Despite the cold, I loved the rain. It was a refreshing change to the constant heat and sun. I would no longer have to be covered head to toe in sunscreen.

Glancing at my schedule and the map, I headed off in the direction of building 3. I ended up following two girls with raincoats tightly wrapped around them. They walked into the classroom I was going to and hung their coats up before sitting down at the back of the room. Everyone turned to watch me as I stood beside the teacher's desk.

Mr Mason gave me a reassuring smile and handed me the semester's booklist. I took an empty seat in the front corner by the window by a shy looking girl. She had long, light brown hair and matching eyes framed by glasses. During the lesson she introduced herself as Angela. I didn't respond but angled my chair away from her. I didn't like being rude, but I couldn't get close to anyone.

In fourth period trig I sat next to a talkative girl who didn't care that I didn't say anything to her. She seemed happy enough doing all the talking. She was there in my trig class as well. I had the delight of sitting next to her for another hour – note the sarcasm. This time she decided to invite me to sit with her at lunch. Even though she'd asked, I didn't have much choice in the matter as she dragged me to the cafeteria.

"Hey guys. This is my new friend Isabella. Make her feel welcome, she doesn't talk very much."

"It's just Bella."

I had to do something to stop them all from calling me Isabella. That name was worse than not talking. One of the guys had a cute baby face with pale blond hair gelled into messy yet organised spikes smiling at in a way that was way too friendly. He sat next to me and threw his arm around my shoulder.

"Hi. I'm Mike. Do you want me to show you round town after school?"

Shaking my head, he started to stroke the top of my arm. I felt more uncomfortable and shifted in my seat. When another guy, Eric I think his name is, sat on the other side of me, he too wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I had yet to eat anything but already felt like I was going to throw up. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and stood up slowly.

The whole cafeteria silenced as their eyes turned to mine. Only five pairs of eyes weren't on me. From the one glance I got of them, I could see everything I needed too. There were three boys and two girls; each completely different yet similar in subtleties.

The first was tall and well built- muscled if you will. I'd seen wrestlers and weight lifters on TV when Phil had been watching and this boy could rival their size. He had dark curly hair and dark blue eyes. Beside him was a tall girl. She was statuesque and stunningly beautiful. Her figure was the kind you saw on the front cover of a magazine. One look at her and your self-esteem plummets below zero. Her hair was much like Esme's, a golden colour that gently waved to the middle of her back. Her eyes were a violet colour veering towards brown more than blue.

To the left of her was a taller, leaner yet concealed muscled boy. His hair was honey blond; much like the girl's and Esme's but darker. His eyes were the same brown as theirs too. He had his arm wrapped around a small pixie like girl. She was thin with small features. Her hair was a similar colour to the first boy's as it was deep black, cropped short and pointing all over the place. You couldn't help but think that it was made to look that way.

I couldn't see much of the last guy as he had his back to me. He was lanky though, more lanky than the other two guys. His hair was an untidy bronze mess on top of his head. It looked as though he woke up and just ran his hand through it. With hunched shoulders, he leaned over his food and poked at it. He was the most beautiful of them all.

I noticed all of this in a split second before running out of the cafeteria. Everything was getting to be too much. It had been 5 and a half hours since I'd seen little Edward and I was worried.


	5. First Hospital Visit

**First Hospital Visit**

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I hid behind the building. The dial tone rang twice before it was picked up.

"Hello, Swan residence Esme Cullen speaking."

"Hey Esme."

"Oh. Hi Bella. How's school going?"

"Fine. How's Ed doing? Is he alright?"

"He's been an angel Bella. He woke up not long after you left and had a lot of energy. I played with him for a bit and then fed him. I read him a book and he fell asleep about half an hour ago. He's so cute Bella."

Leaning against the wall, I pulled my hood further round my face as an icy breeze hit my face.

"Has he cried or screamed?"

"He cried a little after he realised you weren't nearby, but I calmed him down and he was fine. He can tell when you aren't around; you have a special connection."

"He's everything to me. I love him so much."

The bell rang from the building behind me and I heard Esme sigh.

"You should head to class Bella. Only an hour left and don't forget to go to the supermarket. Your fridge and cupboards are scarily bare."

"I'll see you later Bella."

"Bye Esme."

I hung up before I could say anything. People stared rushing past me on their way to the next class. As the clock neared 2 o'clock, I entered block 7 and made my way to my biology class. The first person I noticed when I walked through the door was the bronze haired beauty from the corner of the cafeteria. He sat at the lab table in the middle of the back row alone. Again he was the only one not to look up when I entered.

With my textbook in hand, I was sent to the back of the room to the only available seat in the room; next to bronze beauty. His eyes flicked to me as I stumbled towards him and I saw his piercing green eyes. I dropped my bag to the floor and carefully placed my textbook on the desk. A pale ghost white hand shifted beside me.

"Hello."

Looking up through my eyelashes, I glanced at his face. He was more beautiful than I first thought. With angular, high cheekbones, strong jawline, a straight nose and full kissable lips, he is an Adonis. Wait. Kissable lips? Adonis? Since when did I start finding boys attractive?

"Are you okay?"

I realised that I had been staring at his face for a while now. Averting my eyes to my textbook, I hastily flicked to the right page. Mitosis and Meiosis. I'd done this before. Good.

"I'm Edward."

"Esme's son?"

I didn't mean to say that out loud, but I guess I did.

"You know my Mom?"

Thankfully Mr Banner asked him a question and took his attention away from me. After answering the question, he turned back to me.

"You know my Mom."

Instead of saying it as a question like the last time, he made it seem like a statement. I might as well tell him, and he won't ask questions about it.

"She's… uh… looking after my baby brother during the day."

"Oh. She's been taking about that for the last three weeks non-stop. She loves kids."

I just nodded and pretended to focus on what Mr Banner was saying. It worked as he didn't say anything else. However, twenty minutes into the class a phone started to ring, echoing through the room. Everyone had been silent, copying notes from the board and turned to look at me. It was my phone.

Intending to hang it up, I became intensely worried when I saw Esme Cullen's name as the caller ID. My chair fell to the floor as I stood quickly and ran out of the room. As soon as I pressed the answer button I heard a loud high pitched scream on the other end.

"Bella? Bella I'm so sorry but his gums are hurting, and he won't drink his milk. What should I do Bella?"

"Take him to hospital Esme, our doctor is Dr Morgan. If she's busy take him to whatever doctor is free. I'll be there as soon as I can."

Hanging up on her, I flung the door open and ran to my desk. Mr Banner blocked my way from leaving by standing between the two desks I was trying to get through.

"Miss Swan take a seat."

"Sir I need to go. My brothers in the hospital and they won't let him see a doctor unless a member of the family is there."

"Okay, go but detention at lunch tomorrow for having your phone on during class."

"Fine."

He stepped aside, and I ran past him only to drop my books that had been tucked under my arm. Whispers circled me once again today as I bent down to pick them up. Two pale hands stopped me and stood me up.

"Go. I'll get them for you."

I didn't have a chance to say sorry before my feet were carrying me out to the parking lot. Jumping into my car, I started the race to the hospital. Outside the hospital building, I could hear the screams and cries of a little baby boy. I pulled into the first spot I saw and sprinted into the small waiting room.

To the side of the room sat a terrified Esme cradling a struggling Edward. Grabbing him into my arms, I tried to quiet him as I stood in front of the receptionist.

"Is Dr Morgan free?"

"I'm afraid not. She's busy for the next three hours. Dr Cullen's just come in. You can see him. Room 12. Down the hall and to the right. Family only."

Sprinting down the hall, I burst through the door of room 12 to find a handsome blond haired man. He was pale though, with purple circles under his eyes. Immediately he gestured for the bed at the side of the room. I placed little Ed on the bed and stroked the side of his face.

"It's his gums. Can you give him something for the pain? Please?"

Suddenly he was injecting something into his arm and he quieted instantly. I lifted him into my arms and continuously kissed his forehead. He was asleep in my arms and looked peaceful.

"Miss Swan?"

My lips kept kissing his forehead as I turned to the doctor.

"I'd like to give him a full check over. There might be more than his gums that are hurting."

"Okay. Okay. Can I step outside for a minute?"

"Of course."

I lay him back on the bed and pressed my lips to each of his tiny hands. Walking backwards, I stepped out of the room and closed the door. Tears flooded my eyes as I sank to the floor and started to cry. It hurt to see him in so much pain and I couldn't do anything about it. I could be at school and he'd breakout in pain. There would be little I could do to help him.

Calming down, I stood up on shaky legs and put my chin up. I walked back into the doctor's room. Dr Cullen was sat on the bed next to Edward and held his miniscule hand in his. He looked up at me and gave me a small smile.

"He's a beautiful boy. Looks a lot like you Miss Swan."

"Everyone says that."

I lifted him into my arms and rocked him side to side. He started to wake up and blinked up to me. A small smile covered his face and he reached his chubby fingers out to my face. I raised him so that he could ghost his fingers across my nose. Who wouldn't smile and love the feeling of these little actions?

"Hey baby. I love you."

His eyes were wide and innocent, and his plump little lips were open ever so slightly. He became inquisitive as he took in the room around him before watching Dr Cullen. A small hand reached in his direction, his hand grabbing at thin air.

"He likes you."

His eyes scrunched up as he continued to grasp at the air.

"Do you want to hold him?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. He wants you too."

Tenderly, he lifted Edward from my arms. Ed's two little hands went straight to his face and he traced every inch of his face. I chuckled at Dr Cullen's shocked and slightly scared face.

"He does this with most new people he meets. Anyone he likes he'll do this to. It's best to go with it or he'll start to cry."

"What's his name?"

"Oh right."

After all this time, I still hadn't introduced him.

"This is Edward Charles Swan."

"Swan?"

"Yeah."

Dr Cullen, I trusted him. I now trusted Esme too. She knows the truth, so why shouldn't he? It may make things easier for me in the future if he knew.

"Edward's not my brother."

"What?"

Taking one of the little hands into mine, I kissed his soft knuckles.

"He's my son."


	6. Kindness

**Kindness**

For a long time, he stood slightly stunned, staring down at my baby boy. It had been an emotional year all because of the little four month old boy in his arms. Despite everything that happened, I love him more than anything in the world. He is my world.

Sensing the atmosphere change in the room, Edward's eyes scrunched up and he started to cry. I scooped him into my arms, cradling him to my chest. As his mother, I hated seeing anything but happiness on his face. I pecked his nose and nuzzled my face with his.

"I love you baby. Momma's here. Momma's here, you're safe."

It took ten minutes to settle him down, but I finally managed it.

"I'm sorry Miss Swan."

"It's fine. I love him and he's safe that's all that matters."

He nodded and gestured to the medical bed. I lay little Ed back on the bed and tickled his tummy to reassure him.

"Would you like me to look him over now?"

"Yes please."

I stood beside Dr Cullen as he checked over my little boy. Ed was very good as he didn't cry or fuss. Once it was all done, I pulled his coat back over his arms and blew a raspberry on his stomach. He giggled and clapped his hands above his face. I always knew how to make him happy.

"Esme knows."

"I assumed so. She has been so excited to meet the two of you. It's all she has talked about."

"She's a wonderful woman. Very kind and caring."

"That's why I married her."

A bright smile made its way onto his face as I looked up at him. There was so much love on his face and in his eyes as he thought of his wife. I hoped that one day someone would think of me that way.

"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't tell anyone. My mom, dad, stepdad and I agreed that it would be better for me and Ed that no one knows the truth. It makes my life easier so that I don't have to face any problems at school. Little Ed here can also start his life in a calm and safe environment."

Tickling his tummy again, I lifted him into my arms. I swung him round once, causing him to giggle.

"Thank you for helping."

"Esme called as she was heading here and asked me to come in just in case everyone else would be busy."

I immediately felt bad. He'd given up his day off for my baby.

"I'm so sorry. You didn't have to give up your day off for us. We could have waited."

He put his hand on my shoulder and shook his head.

"It's okay. I was on call anyway. If you ever need any help I'll be here. I understand that it's difficult for young mothers to cope with everything. You've got the stress of caring for your baby and getting a good education."

"I don't like leaving him. Today was the first day I spent more than an hour away from him. He's my baby."

He'd opened the door and we headed towards the waiting room. Holding the door open, I stepped into the waiting room to see Edward Cullen and Esme sitting where I'd left her. They both stood up when they saw us and made their way towards us.

"Hey Bella."

I avoided looking at Edward, wishing he wasn't here. It's not that I don't like him. From what I've seen so far, he is really kind and caring. I don't want to get close to him though.

"Hey."

"I brought you your books."

"Thanks."

Taking them from him, I tucked them under my arm. He seemed unsure of letting go of the books at first but did. I just wanted to go home now and spend some time with my Edward.

"How's Edward?"

As Carlisle was about to respond, a confused Edward spoke first.

"I'm fine."

"I guess I should introduce you. This is Edward, my brother."

I emphasized the word, brother, to get my point across to Esme and Dr Cullen. My eyes caught Esme's and she gave me a sympathetic smile.

"He's beautiful Bella."

A tight smile formed on my lips and I looked down at my baby. He had his eyes closed whilst stretching his tiny arms.

"Little Edward is doing alright. I could see his gums are a little swollen. There isn't much you can do about that. Keep him on his medicine at least once a day and if he doesn't take it, bring him in."

"Okay. Thank you again."

"It was no problem Miss Swan."

Looking back at Esme, I gave her a gentle smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow Esme. Thank you for calling me today."

"I'll talk to you in the morning Bella. Be safe."

"Bye."

I whispered my goodbye before heading straight out of the hospital. They are not my favourite places in the world. They are full of people in pain or dying. I'd been in many hospitals over the years, my trips becoming more frequent in the last year.

Opening my car door, I realised that Edward's baby seat was in Esme's car. I closed the door and leaned against it, holding Ed tightly to my chest. The cold air circled us as I watched Esme and her son, Edward leave the hospital. I went straight up to them and quietly asked for the baby seat. She helped me get it situated into the passenger seat of my car before saying goodbye again.

By the time I got home it was already 6:30. Charlie would be home soon, and I hadn't gone to the supermarket. Guess we'd be having take out again.

Once I'd got Ed settled in a pile of pillows on the living room floor with a shaker, I started tidying up around the house. In the back of my mind I couldn't help but think that this was just a way to distract myself. But distract myself from what? All I seemed to be able to think about was the bronze haired beauty I sit next to in Biology.

He looked so lonely in the cafeteria; even his friends seemed to be separated from him. Then in Biology, he was the only one sitting alone. Everyone sat around him chatting to their friends, but he didn't. He was alone. Like me. When I sat beside him, his reaction was very different to what I was expecting. He was so kind to me and seemed to want to at least be civil with me. Then he was so caring when I dropped my books in my rush to get to my Edward. His kindness meant a lot to me. I couldn't get close to him though. If he ever found out that Ed was my son, he'd make rude remarks and before I could blink everyone would know.

A cry brought me back down to the world around me and I realised I'd been wiping the same spot of the dining table for almost ten minutes. I dropped the cloth onto the table and ran into the living room. My Edward had dropped his rattle and I assumed it had hit him on the head.

"Oh baby."

Stroking his head, I took one of his tiny feet into my fingers. I rubbed small circles on the sole of his foot. His cries quieted until he was just whimpering. This was all I wanted in life. I wanted my baby safe and happy and then I would be happy.


	7. Assignment

**Assignment**

Three weeks. I'd been living my new life for three weeks now. In my opinion everything was going great. Esme and I had built up a really good relationship. She'd arrive every morning at eight and stay after I got home till about half four. She even stayed for dinner once. Charlie seemed to have a soft spot for her as well.

Then there was Angela. I never spoke much at school and when I did it was with Angela and occasionally Edward. Angela was really nice to me and never expected anything from me. We didn't talk often but it was nice to sit together in the silence and read a book. I got the chance to introduce her to my 'brother' when she came back to mine to help with some homework. We were becoming close friends and I trusted her.

It turned out that I sat next to Edward Cullen in Health Class as well as Biology. He'd always greet me when I'd sit down and ask how I was doing. With a basic answer of fine, he'd go onto ask about my little Edward. His voice was always soft and gentle when he spoke to me. I couldn't trust him. Not yet. That didn't mean I couldn't be his friend though.

He looked as handsome as always as I took my seat beside. My favourite crooked smile adorned his face that was reserved for me. Despite hating the subject, I loved Health class because I got to sit with Edward.

"Hello Bella."

"Hi."

"How are you doing today Bella?"

"I'm fine."

Placing my books on the table, I gave him my regular small smile.

"Is little Ed alright?"

"Yes. He's as beautiful as always. His gums are getting worse though. Your father said that it was because his first tooth is nearly ready to come through."

My hands started to shake a little as I thought about the pain my baby had been in recently. His pale fingers reached out and lay over my hand. In response, I let out a long breath that I'd been holding.

"I'm sure he'll be okay Bella."

One look into his eyes and I could see his sincerity. He'd only met my son once but seemed to care and worry about him too.

"Thanks."

Before he spoke again, Mr Grays started the lesson. I'd particularly hated Health class last Monday as we did teen pregnancy. Most of the class complained about everything Mr Grays had said, saying that being a parent would be easy. I knew otherwise.

Mrs Cope wheeled a trolley into the room and everyone leaned forward, trying to see what was in the boxes. Only Edward and I didn't seem to care all that much. We all watched Mrs Cope leave the room and close the door behind her.

"So class, last week you all said that it would be easy to care for a baby at your age. I thought you should all see for yourselves what it's like to be young parents. I've paired you up and assigned you a simulator baby each. You'll have to care for the baby for a month between you. How you do that is up to you. Each baby has a monitor so at the end of the assignment I'll see how well you've done."

The class was divided in their reaction. Some, including Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory, were excited about it. Others looked sceptical. Me on the other hand I was stressed out. I already had my little Ed to look after but now another baby. And I was supposed to do this with a partner.

"Jessica Stanley and Mike Newton."

I watched them both stand and walk to the front of the class. Mr Grays handed them a plastic baby dressed in a pink romper.

"Meet Jenny."

They took their baby and sat together as Mr Grays continued down the list. Lauren ended up with a guy named Callum who she looked down upon. He's smart, in AP Math and wears glasses. He's cute but not that good looking. She doesn't like him for it.

It got to the point where there were no more babies in the boxes and Edward and I were the only ones left. Mr Grays handed out a pamphlet to each pair before coming over to us. He pulled a chair up to our desk and sat down.

"I'm afraid when I planned this lesson you weren't here Bella. I know that Edward volunteers at the hospital, so I wasn't going to make you do the assignment if you volunteered every day for the next month."

"I can do that."

"That's all well and good but as I understand it, you Bella take on a full time parent role when you aren't at school with your brother."

I nodded to him and clutched my hands under the desk.

"With your permission Bella, would you pair up with Edward and you care for your brother together? Anything you don't want to do you don't have to as this isn't a simulation."

"I guess. It could be nice but only if Edward wants to."

His hand took mine and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"I'd like to give it a go. I'll step away if Bella wants me to, but I think it would be good for the both of us to at least try."

Whilst he spoke he stared at me and our eyes created a link. All of a sudden it was like I was seeing him for the first time. His eyes sparkled with an emotion that I hadn't seen before. I couldn't put my finger on the particular emotion, but it was a good one and made me feel warm inside.

"Okay. If you get started on that tonight or tomorrow, see how it goes and if you decide to stop at any point just let me know."

He stood up and walked to the front of the class, leaving us alone. A short silence fell over us as his hand slipped off mine.

"Are you sure you're alright with this Bella?"

"Yeah. I think it could be interesting."

Another silence fell over us. It became awkward as I started to fiddle with my fingers in a method of distraction. I watched the rest of the class fond over their babies.

"Do you want to come over to my house after school? You can bring your brother. I know that you know my mom and dad a bit, but I don't think…"

"No. I'd rather not yet. You can come to mine though. I go home after Biology, but you can come around any time you want."

"Do you think I could come with you?"

Scrunching my eyes, my voice became a whisper.

"Won't you miss class?"

"Just music. It won't make much difference. I would like to come and see little Edward."

"Sure."

The bell finally decided to ring, and I sighed rather too loudly. Edward gave me a weird look and raised one eyebrow.

"I'll see you in Biology then."

"Yeah. Bye."

I left the room as quickly as I could, the noisy world around me catching up. Everyone was loud and excited for the prospect of the next month. I was a little unsure of what was going to happen. It would be alright if I was like all of them. They didn't have a baby themselves yet thought they had the right to judge how easy it was. This assignment would test a lot of people.


	8. New Father

**New Father**

Biology was awkward. Edward was happier than normal. Even though neither of us said anything, I enjoyed how happy he was. I looked forward to spending some time with him. I couldn't figure out what it was I was feeling when around him. All I know is that I feel safe in his presence.

As everyone headed to their last lesson of the day, I led Edward out to the parking lot. He started of walking behind me but then came up alongside me and slipped his hand into mine. I misjudged the feeling his touch would bring. The pale colour led me to believe his touch would be cold. I was wrong. His touch was warm, comforting and sent a spark through my body.

I took my hand from his and stuck both in my hoodie pockets. At first he left his hand hanging between us before gripping the strap of his backpack. Trying to get past the new found awkwardness between us, I unlocked my car. Unexpectedly, he opened my door and waited till I'd climbed in before he closed it.

It only takes ten minutes to get anywhere in Forks, so there wasn't much time for an awkward silence on the journey. He followed me to the front door where I fumbled with my keys. I loved coming home to my baby and always felt a sense of relief wash over me as I stepped into my home. That wasn't coming though. I was really nervous for the next two weeks to come.

As soon as I had the door open, I called out to Esme.

"I'm home. Where are you Esme?"

"In the living room."

I dropped my bag at the bottom of the stairs and slid my shoes of. I watched Edward do the same before I led him into the living room. Lying in the middle of the floor, on top of several neatly placed cushions was my little Edward. He was wearing a pale blue stripy t-shirt and soft beige cargo shorts. Esme was leaning over him, tickling his stomach. She turned to look at me and her smile widened when she saw who was behind me.

"How was your day Bella?"

Kneeling down beside her, I hooked Ed's hand around my pointing finger.

"It was good. Health class was interesting."

Edward decided to join us and sat Indian style next to me.

"There are 14 new babies in town."

"Teen parent assignment? I remember doing it when I was in high school. I guess you're a new father now then Edward."

"It seems weird, but I guess I am a new father."

I smiled round at her as Ed giggled and shook his hand with my finger in it.

"How did it go for you Esme?"

She chuckled at a memory that stirred up in her mind.

"Gary Brent was my partner. He had no clue what he was doing through whole assignment. It was pass or fail and as I did most of the work I felt confident that we'd pass. Then, Gary was holding the baby and showing off to his friends. He dropped the baby down the stairs twenty minutes before the assignment was supposed to finish and we failed."

"Well I definitely won't be dropping little Edward ever."

His words calmed some of my nervous as I lifted my son into my arms. Esme pecked each of our foreheads before standing up.

"I'm going to head home now. Are you going to be home for dinner tonight Edward?"

"I'll text you when I'm leaving."

"Okay. Be good you two."

She left the room and I listened until I heard the front door close. Edward's hand lay on my back causing me to suck in a deep breath.

"What do you normally do now?"

He'd moved slightly closer to me until his thigh was against mine. I kept my focus on the baby in my arms, trying to ignore his touch. It had sent another spark through my body even though our skin wasn't touching.

"I spend time with Ed. I miss him when I'm at school, so I like to spend as much time with him when I get home before I have to start on the dinner."

"You take on a full on mother role don't you Bella?"

Nodding, I pressed my lips to Ed's nose and smiled. We talked for a little while longer and we ended up sitting on the couch. His arm was around my back, resting his hand on my hip. I was cradling my Edward to my chest as Edward lay his hand over mine.

"Bella?"

I felt his breath on my neck and slowly turned my head towards him. His face was close to mine, our eyes locked together. He started to lean down, and my eyes fluttered shut. Moments before his lips were to touch mine, a cry from my arms broke us apart. Standing up, I rushed into the kitchen with my crying baby.

Whilst I fixed a bottle of mix, my mind whirred. I was about to kiss Edward Cullen. Well he was going to kiss me, and I was going to let him. Did I want him to kiss me? Easy. Yes, yes I wanted him to. I wanted to feel his lips against mine. That scared me. I didn't want him to kiss me. I didn't want to become attached to him, but I fear it's too late for that. I fear that I already am attached. If Ed hadn't cried would he have kissed me? Would I have let it go that far? I knew the answer to that. I wouldn't have been able to stop him. It seemed that he wanted it just as much as me. The feeling of his arms around me, making me feel loved whilst showing he cared for my baby, I loved it.

"Do you want any help Bella? I can get started on dinner."

Looking round at the clock, I saw that it was already nearly six o'clock. Time flies when you're having fun. Was I having fun with Edward? It definitely wasn't awkward between us, not until now at least. I enjoy his company. He makes me smile much like my own Edward does.

"Would you like to stay for dinner? You can if you want to. Charlie won't mind."

"Do you want me to?"

A light blush covered his cheeks and he looked adorable staring at the table.

"I'd like that."

This time it was my turn to blush but unlike him it flared a bright red. Turning away from him, I lifted out a chopping board and knife and placed an onion on top.

"Then you can start chopping the onions. I thought about a basic spaghetti Bolognese dish."

"Sounds great."

I watched him make a start on the dish and I gave Ed his bottle of milk. He drank it quickly, chugging it down his throat. Everything was calm and relaxed, and I loved it. Maybe this assignment wouldn't be so bad after all.


	9. White

**White**

School had become better. With little Edward in my arms I couldn't be happier. Of course everyone else seemed so excited to have babies in their arms. I could already see who was getting out of the work, the main person being Lauren Mallory. She'd left her partner, Callum to do all the work.

Edward now sat at my table along with Angela, Ben, Jessica and Mike. Jess seemed ecstatic with the new addition to the table. It didn't seem to register with her that Edward was my partner in this assignment and if this had all been real, we'd have slept together. My cheeks flamed red as I thought about that. Why would he ever want to sleep with me? I'm just a plain, ugly girl that's been used.

I quickly moved my thoughts on as Edward had sat next to me. Three days passed with Edward arriving at my house every morning and driving me to school with little Ed in my arms. I'd go through each lesson with my son in my arms as Edward would walk us to each lesson. He'd drive me home and stay for dinner before going home.

Soon enough, Friday arrived and but when I awoke in the morning white streamed through the window. I rolled from bed and stumbled towards the window. A sheet of glistening white snow graced the street. It was the first time in ten years I'd seen this white beauty. The last time was when I was eight years old. It was the first Christmas I'd had with my father that I could remember.

I'd enjoyed the snow with my father and now I wanted my son to enjoy the snow with me. Young children were already running up and down the street, throwing snowballs and laughing. It was only half six in the morning. I rushed into the shower and had a quick wash. I didn't want to waste a single minute of the day.

By the time I was ready for the day it was only seven o'clock. Lifting my sleeping baby, I rocked him until he was awake before changing his diaper and wrapping him up in the thickest coat he had. He looked like a giant marshmallow with a red wholly hat, matching scarf, mittens and bright red welly boots.

Instead of going into the back yard where it was quieter, I carried Edward out the front. I sat down in a soft pile of freezing snow and placed my son in my lap. He kicked his legs about excitedly, his feet sinking into the snow. The look of pure joy on his face brought tears to my eyes. I picked up small bits of snow and cupped his hand in mine, letting the snow drop into his hand. He shrieked in delight and clutched his hand into a tiny fist.

When he opened his hand, the snow had obviously melted causing him to cry. I placed more into his hand and his cries stopped. It continued on like that for a while before I could see his mittens becoming soaked through. Turning him round in my lap, I stood him up but as he couldn't support himself I held him under his armpits. I shook him gently as I lifted him above my head. He loved this as he started to laugh loudly.

A familiar silver car pulled up just along the road from us. The engine died and out stepped the gorgeous Edward Cullen. He had black skinny jeans and a light blue denim button up with a leather jacket to keep him warm. He was hot. So unbelievably hot dressed like that. I realised that I'd been staring at him as he'd walked towards me, the cold forming a red glow to become present.

"Good morning. I can see you two enjoy the snow."

"Who doesn't?"

He chuckled and knelt down in front of me.

"My sister hates it."

"Alice or Rose?"

"Rose. According to her it's alright if she's throwing it at someone else and if it doesn't come anywhere near her hair."

Hooking his fingers under Ed's armpits, I let him lift him into the air. I stood up and dusted my bum off; I was starting to freeze out here.

"How long have you been out here Bella? You're shaking."

He transferred Ed into one arm and wrapped his other around my shoulder. Rubbing the top of my arm, I felt the friction warm me up through my thick jacket. He started leading me up my driveway and into my house. I let him lead me despite wanting to stay in the snow a bit longer.

"We should head to school soon. The roads are a little dangerous because of the ice but it is safe enough driving slow."

All I could do was nod up at him. Just like my legs, my mind had frozen. This was to do with the slight bit of drool in the corner of my mouth. Every day he seemed to get hotter and hotter.

His arms wrapped around me and something heavy rested against my shoulders. I was lifted into his arms before being lain on the soft couch. For the first time I didn't think about my baby boy. In the back of my mind I knew he was safe. Edward wouldn't let anything bad happen to him.

Another blanket was wrapped around my shoulders and a hot water bottle tucked into them. I could feel my body warming up so let my eyes close for a minute. As I opened them, I saw Edward standing in front of me but facing away. He was holding my Edward. I stood up quickly and his focus turned to me. My favourite crooked smile lay on his lips as he reached his hand out to me.

I stepped straight into his arm and slid my hand up his cheek. Bringing his head down to mine, I pressed my lips to his. At first he didn't respond but then he moved his lips against mine. Smiling into the kiss, I opened my mouth for his tongue. Suddenly little Ed disappeared from between us. Both of Edward's arms wound round my back and rest over my bum. He took a step forwards causing me to take a step back. My knees hit the edge of my bed and he pushed me down onto it. With my knees bent, he nestled between them and brought his lips back to mine.

"Bella? Bella?"

My eyes flew open to see Edward knelt in front of my face. He was cradling a sleeping Ed in his arms and I gave him a small smile.

"Why don't you go get changed into some dry clothes and we'll head to school?"

"Okay."

Holding his hand out, I took it and he helped me stand up. I was close to him so took a quick step back and dropped my hand from his. I'd thought that my dream had been real at first. It was the best dream I'd had in a long time and I wanted it to continue. That would be another thing on a long list that I would never get to experience.

Once I'd pulled on some dry clothes and shoes, I made my way back to the living room. Edward was sat on the couch with my son in his arms. He stood when he saw me and passed Ed into my arms. I pecked his little forehead. He was always so cute when he slept.

"Let's go Bella."


	10. Crash

**Crash**

Edward stood by the front door with both our bags over each of his shoulders. He'd been carrying my bag at school this last week despite every one of my protests. It made me feel a little uncomfortable at first as most people at school began to stare at us. Those who didn't were too focused on their simulation babies in their arms.

As I walked towards Edward, I swung Ed's bag onto one shoulder and lifted my old thin coat from the hook. I couldn't afford any new clothes for myself and as it never really got cold in Arizona, all I had was a thin coat. It didn't do much here in Forks, but it did enough.

When I got to Edward's shiny silver Volvo, he opened the door for me. His hand rested on my hip as he helped me climb into the car with the sleeping baby in my arms. I shifted my son between my arms whilst Edward buckled my belt in for me. His lips hovered beside my cheek and I held my breath.

"Are you alright Bella?"

I let out the breath I had been hold and nodded to him.

"I'm fine, thanks."

At that moment I did feel a little unwell. I felt myself shivering slightly but didn't want him to know. He'd tell me to stay home and would take Ed to school with him to let me rest. I didn't want that and wouldn't let it happen.

"Esme would like it if you were to come around for dinner with little Ed tonight. She hasn't seen either of you all week."

My eyes stayed on the boy in my arms as I considered the offer. It would be nice to see Esme again. She was much like a mother to me and I missed that. My own mother wasn't much of a mother in the first place so to even get a small chance to have that sort of a figure in my life was amazing.

"I'd like that. I've missed her. She's a great mother."

"I'm lucky I guess. I could be in a group house if I hadn't been adopted."

We became silent as he focused on the road. I stared out of the window to see the surrounding forest a fresh white colour. Even though the sky was the usual dark cloud, everywhere seemed naturally bright as the snow reflected what light there was.

"I'd like it if you could stay the night."

He wanted me to stay at his night. I couldn't help but think that maybe he liked me and wanted me to stay with him.

"I mean we are supposed to be working on the assignment together, but I haven't taken the night shift yet. I don't want to say that you have to let me take Ed home by myself, so you could stay, and I'll help. I'd like to help, and you look really tired. You could use a break. Esme had been hoping that you'd stay round some time anyway and…"

"Take a breath Edward. I'd like to stay but I wouldn't want to impose."

"You wouldn't be."

I caught a small smile from him as he pulled into the school parking lot. Everyone was standing around in the snow, smiling and laughing but still stood to watch his car drive by. Since I'd first arrived at school in his car, they always watched to see what we'd do. Rumours had spread about us dating and Edward adopting my brother as his own son. I just ignored them all.

"After school, we'll go back to mine, so I can pack some things and then we'll go to yours."

"Okay. I'll text my mom to let her know at lunch. We should get to class though."

Smiling, I watched him push his door open and step into the cold air. Climbing out myself, I held my son closer to my chest. Everything then happened at once. The sound of ripping metal stung my ears and woke Ed in my arms. His cries matched my feelings as I stood petrified. A dark blue van sped towards me and I had no time to get out of the way. I recognised the van as Tyler Crowley's and looked closer to see his terrified face whilst he struggled to gain control. Using my body and arms as best I could, I shielded my baby and let my eyes close.

I was hit; the impact wasn't what I expected and realised why. A cold body had knocked me to the ground causing my head to smack against the asphalt. Dazed, I didn't register what happened next. My only thoughts were on my wailing baby in my arms.

"Bella? Bella are you alright?"

Panic surrounded me as my eyes flickered. I was finding it difficult to stay conscious.

"Can you hear me Bella? Open your eyes."

Laying my head against the freezing ground, I found it easier to open my eyes. With them half open, I could see Edward's worried face above me. We were in an enclosed space with the frightening van wedging us between against his Volvo. The front end had been smashed, the side mirror crushed to pieces. Edward's body was pressed to mine, his chest protecting my still crying baby.

I tried to sit up off the cold ground but was held down by Edward's strong hands.

"Lie down Bella. You might have a concussion."

My teeth chattered together as I let my eyes close. The warm but loud, tiny body disappeared from against my chest and despite the terror that washed through me, I didn't have the energy to fight.

"Baby…"

"Little Ed's fine sweetheart. You kept him safe but now you need to look after yourself. Rose will quiet him down and warm him up."

One of his hands rested on my hip and he pulled me into his chest. His other hand scooped under my head. With his body against mine, I embraced the warmth that radiated from him.

"The ambulance will be here soon Bella. Stay awake for me sweetheart. Try and keep your eyes open."

He said it again. It wasn't difficult to notice that he had called me sweetheart twice now. The name alone warmed me from the inside. Maybe he liked me too. A loud siren made my pounding head worse. I opened my eyes and found the green pools I was looking for. The sirens switched off, but now blue lights flashed all around.

Heavy footsteps grew louder and the atmosphere surrounding us seemed lighter. There was more space around us as students moved away.

"Bella? Bella?"

The voice was easy to recognise. Even in the moment of panic, I felt comforted by my Dad's voice.

"Dad…"

"He's right here Bella. Hold on."

His body hovered over mine as a squealing sound pierced my ears. I peeked over his shoulder and saw the blue van scraping across the icy ground. It was moving away from us ever so slowly until there was at least a meter between it and us. A paramedic rushed down the side of the truck and knelt beside us. Edward sat up and moved away from me a little to give the paramedic space.

"Can you hear me Bella?"

"Ye…"

"Okay. Good. We'll get a stretcher in here for you. I know it's cold, but you need to stay awake just a little longer."

It was only half a minute later when I was being lifted onto a stretcher and carefully lifted away from the van. A blanket was thrown over me, but it wasn't much help. I felt a warm hand grasp mine as whispers of my fellow students surrounded me.

"I'll be right behind you Bella. You're gonna be alright. I love you baby girl."

My father's hand disappeared from mine and I realised how much I was shaking. I was shaking all over and couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. Two fingers quickly lifted my wrist before slowly placing them by my side.

"Her pulse is slowing. She's bordering on hypothermia."

The stretcher was lifted higher and I was slid into the back of an ambulance. If it wasn't for someone stepping into the ambulance behind me with my whimpering baby, I would have forced myself up to find him. Another blanket was tucked around me as the sirens started up again. Someone removed my shoes and socks slowly and carefully, making sure my ankles or feet weren't broken.

"We'll need to get her in for an x-ray. Edward said she hit the ground hard."

The ambulance came to a stop and the doors flung open. Fingers shaking, I clenched them together, trying to control the shaking.


	11. Dream

**Dream**

Bright fluorescent lights shone through my eyelids as I was wheeled through the familiar hospital. Without having to open my eyes, I could see where we were. The walls were a dull clean white with a line of blue cushioned chairs along three of the walls. A small desk sat in the far corner of the room next to a door less doorway. I was wheeled straight through there and into a spotless white room. A different set of two fingers went under my jaw before tapping the side of my face.

"Bella stay with me okay."

I groaned as the door swung open and a cold draft blew in.

"Can I get a hot cloth over her face? Our main priority is to warm her up and get her away from falling into hypothermia. Ashley, take her wet clothes off and put her in a gown. We'll get some blood from her and warm it up."

The voice was so familiar, but I couldn't get my brain to work. I was so cold. I felt the blankets rip from me and fingers fiddled with my clothes. As the damp, wet clothes were removed from me, a hospital gown was pulled over me. A needle slipped into the crook of my elbow, but I didn't feel it. My body was numb, but I could feel the blood draining from me.

I started to grow weaker as more and more blood was taken from my body. My breathing grew shorter and I began my struggle to breath.

"Get an oxygen mask on her. She's weak and getting weaker."

A firm hand placed an uncomfortable bit of plastic over my mouth and an elastic strap was wrapped around my head. Immediately, my body relaxed as I didn't have to use as much energy in my breathing. I felt the needle pull from my arm, but another was inserted.

"Bella, stay with me just a few more minutes. It's all gonna be alright. We'll warm you up and then you can sleep. I want a heart monitor on her stat. She's not to be left alone till I give the all clear."

The last bit obviously wasn't directed to me, but I felt as though it was. It was as if he was trying to reassure me that I wasn't alone. Yet again another needle was inserted into my elbow but on my other arm. Warmth slowly flooded me, and I could feel my muscles start to relax.

"This is going to help you rest Bella. When you wake up you'll feel better. Someone will be here the whole time."

With the gentle words, a needle slid into the top of my arm and I felt my body soften against the uncomfortable bed. There was nothing surrounding me but a black abyss. It was as if I was floating in mid-air. Instead of the dreary hospital gown, I was wearing a plain blue cotton dress that floated around my thighs.

A hand slipped into mine and I turned my head to see emerald green eyes staring at me. Suddenly my back was resting against something soft. I didn't want to look away from the beauty in front of me so used my free hand to feel around me. It was a soft mattress. The fact that I hadn't noticed it let me know that it was the same black that still surrounded me.

Clair de Lune began to play in the background and my hand was raised to soft smooth lips. A small smile lay across my lips as he lay down beside me. One hand on my waist and the other holding him up, he didn't move but stared down at me. Our eyes locked in a never ending gaze as I ran my fingers up his arm and over his bicep. He was wearing a grey tee with the short sleeves rolled up to his broad shoulders. Not wanting to break the connection between us, I didn't look to see what else he was wearing.

The hand on my waist slid down onto my hip and felt like he was going to continue on. My breath caught in my throat as my free hand gripped his wrist. A crooked smile spread across his face. I let go of his wrist and dropped my hand between our bodies. His fingers stayed wrapped around my hip, but his head dipped down towards mine.

"Bella."

His breath fanned across my face and I could taste it on my tongue; my lips slightly parted.

"Bella."

As my eyes had fluttered closed as he leaned closer to me, I opened my eyes only for him to disappear. I was floating again, the bed having disappeared from beneath me. Despite his absence I could still hear him calling my name with Clair de Lune in the background.

My eyelids were heavy as I forced them open. I was staring at an off white ceiling with an uncomfortable bit of plastic over my mouth. Blinking, a warm hand squeezed my cold one and a tuft of bronze hovered over my head. A small smile touched my lips as Edward's worried eyes bore into mine.

"Bella?"

I tried to open my mouth to speak but the oxygen mask stopped me.

"It's okay Bella. Just stay still. I'll call Carlisle."

Shaking my head, yes, my eyelids wavered. He stood from the chair beside me and pressed a red button on the wall. Sitting in the chair beside me, he picked my hand up in his and rubbed soothing circles on the back of my hand.


	12. Trust

**Trust**

The door opened, and Carlisle came in. He took one look at Edward and then me, before picking up my clipboard from the end of the bed.

"It's good to see you awake Bella? Your vitals look good. Your body warmed up nice and quickly once we got you on oxygen. I think you'll be able to be released today but I don't want you to go to school tomorrow."

I furrowed my eyebrows. Was it not Friday? Why would I go to school tomorrow?

"It's Sunday Bella. You've been asleep for just over two days. It's perfectly natural. You were in shock and hit your head hard. There's no concussion or bone damage. Little Ed is perfectly fine. Esme's been looking after him."

Relief flooded me as I relaxed into the hard mattress. I noticed that Edward was still holding onto my hand and rubbing circles. Squeezing his hand, he gave me crooked smile. His hand lay on top of my head.

"Are you feeling okay Bella?"

I gave him a small nod of my head. He seemed to communicate silently with his father before carefully removing the oxygen mask from around my face. Closing my eyes, I breathed in deeply. It was different breathing in the air instead of using the breathing aid.

"I'll take the IV out of your arm, but I want you to try and eat something soon."

I hadn't even noticed that there was a needle in my elbow. They both knew of my fear of needles, so Edward tried to distract me. He squeezed my hand bringing my attention to him and I couldn't look away when he gave me my favourite crooked smile. The needle was gone immediately but a small bruise had already started forming around it.

"I'm going to give you some time to orient yourself and then I'll be back with some food. Edward will stay with you so if you need anything just ask him."

He checked my clipboard once more before putting it back and leaving the room. It was only now, in the silence, that I noticed Clair de Lune playing in the back ground. The melody floated around us as I looked away from him. What surprised me was when he lifted my hand and pressed kisses to each of my knuckles.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you sure you're okay?"

He called me sweetheart again. He was seriously worried about me and cared about me. I cared about him more than I wanted to admit.

"I'm fine."

He raised his eyebrows with a look that I knew he wouldn't give up till I told him everything.

"My head hurts a little and I'm tired but it's not so bad with you here. I would like to hold little Ed in my arms soon though."

"When you've eaten something then you can see him. You do have a common cold and Ed has a weak immune system, so we do have to be careful. I'm not going to stop you from seeing him though."

Not only did he care for me but for my son as well. He didn't know that yet, but I wanted to tell him. I trusted him. The worst thing that could happen is that he hates me and never talks to me again. My heart ached at that thought. If he never spoke to me again I wouldn't know what to do with myself. I depended on him more than I'd realised; more than he knew.

"What are you thinking about sweetheart?"

He'd moved to sit on the edge of the bed beside me, both his hands cupping mine. Moving one of his hands to comb through my hair, I realised that I was only wearing a hospital gown and I probably looked a mess.

"Tell me what you're thinking Bella. I want to know sweetheart. I've been waiting all weekend for you to wake up."

Why shouldn't I tell him now? What's stopping me?

"I'm thinking about you."

He laced his fingers with mine and brought the back of my hand to rub against his cheek. He was a lot more forward and confident now.

"What about me?"

Pressing his lips to my knuckles, his other hand cupped my cheek, running his thumb over my cheek bone.

"I trust you. Trust is difficult for me, but I trust you now."

"What changed your mind?"

Closing my eyes, I relished in his touch hoping I would lose it.

"The truck… You not only saved me, but you saved…"

I couldn't finish my sentence. I didn't want to lose him; I couldn't.

"Your brother?"

"No."

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. With my eyes closed I took his hand that was cupping my cheek and lay in over my stomach with mine.

"You didn't save my brother because you saved my son."

Whispering the words, I opened my eyes. He was still, frozen next to me. There was no going back now. If he rejected me then I'd let him go but I couldn't lie; it would kill me. I could have let him go easily a week ago, but I wasn't the same person I was a week ago.

His fingers twitched against my hand and he returned to kissing my knuckles. My favourite crooked smile spread across his face.

"You are more amazing than I first thought Isabella Swan. If you don't stop me, I may just kiss you."

"What if I want you to kiss me?"

Cupping his cheek, I led his head down to mine. His lips hovered just an inch away from my parted ones and his sweet breath made my lips tingle. Both his hands held the sides of my face as he brushed his lips over mine. I'd imagined what his lips would feel like against mine and my expectations were nothing in comparison to the real thing.

He pressed his lips more firmly to mine and my hand slowly slid my hand up his cheek. Slipping it into his hair, I tangled my fingers with the soft strands. His lips moulded to mine as he kissed me softly. I deepened the kiss by gently sucking on his bottom lip. In response, he pulled my top lip between his and bit down on it. An embarrassing low moan escaped my throat and I felt him smile against my lips.

"I like you Bella. I like you a lot."

Forehead to forehead, with each word I got another taste of his breath.

"I like you too."

I looked up at him through my eyelashes and his breath caught in his throat. A silence fell over us as he pressed his lips to mine. Smiling as he pulled away, he took my hand in his. He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed each of my knuckles. I nestled back into the bed and played with the blanket resting over me.

"Can I see my son now?"

"My father wants you to eat something first. I promise you can see him after that. You need to think about yourself for once Bella. Please. Your son is perfectly safe where he is."

"Will you go to him? Hold him in your arms until I can. Please. I haven't been apart from him for this long. I'll feel happier if you were with him."

He nodded his head and pecked my forehead.

"I'll wait until Carlisle brings in your food."

"Thank you."


	13. Baby

**Baby**

Once Carlisle had given me a plate of bland hospital food, Edward left to go to my son just as I'd asked. I ate as quickly as I could with Carlisle watching on. He sat in the chair beside me, chuckling as I ate. I didn't really care. I just wanted my son back in my arms. Taking the plate away, he was gone for five minutes before returning with Edward behind him. In his arms was my little Edward, asleep. His tiny body was wrapped in a fresh white blanket. Carlisle had raised the back of the bed, so I was sitting up. I reached my hands out and was passed my baby into my arms. His eyes flickered open and looked up at me. Kissing his forehead, I nuzzled my face into his. He giggled and reached his chubby little fingers out.

"Hello my little Edward. I missed you baby."

Rocking him back and forth, I held him as close to me as possible without hurting him. I continued whispering to him for a couple of minutes. The comfort was more for me than him. My voice was soothing to him, but the words were more for me. I could see that his nose was a raw pink. His little sneezes at intervals scared me a bit. He was unwell.

Looking up, I saw Edward sitting in a chair in the corner of the room. He had a small smile on his face as he watched me and my son. I nodded my head to the space he had been sitting in on my bed earlier. Swiftly making his way over to us, he sat close to me. Wrapping his arm around my side and back, his chest touched my baby's side. He cupped that back of Ed's head and stared lovingly down at him. No one but me had looked at him that way before. It made me feel things I hadn't ever experienced before now. His lips pressed to mine and I moaned quietly. Blushing in embarrassment, I pulled away and looked down at my baby boy. He nudged my nose with the top of his, his lips pressing back to mine. Still embarrassed, I kissed him back softly. I cupped his cheek gently and moved his lips from mine.

"You are beautiful Bella. More so with Ed in your arms."

My blush deepened as I stared, dazed into his emerald eyes. I could feel my baby's fingers playing with the top of the hospital gown around me. When he gripped at it and started to pull it down, my eyes shot down to him. I untangled his fingers from the material and let him hook them around my own fingers. Holding him higher in my arms, I placed my lips to his forehead again. Looking up to Edward, he was smiling down at me.

"Am I allowed to leave soon?"

"Carlisle needs to talk to you first. We both want you to stay at our house for the next week to monitor both you and Edward. Charlie's already agreed to it as he's going to Seattle for a convention on Wednesday. I don't want you being alone at all this week."

"I don't want to be a burden to you and your family."

He lay his hand on the back of my head and made me look him into his reassuring eyes.

"You could never be a burden. Esme's wanted you to come over for weeks and I want to be there in the evening and morning for you and Ed. I feel as though you've done everything in this assignment Bella because you're the one that's always tired; you're the one that burps and feeds him; you're the one that takes him to class. I would never force you into anything but please I just want to do more. I love your son Bella. I want to be more for him."

My eyes teared up as I saw his sincerity. Everything he says and does makes me like him so much more. He is amazing. I cupped his cheek and lowered his lips to mine.

"Okay."

His crooked grin lit up his face and I kissed his lips again. As he went to deepen the kiss, the door opened. Both of us pulled away and looked round to see Carlisle standing in the doorway. He cleared his throat before coming into the room, closing the door behind him. Edward stood and moved away from me as his father sat in the chair beside me.

"You and Edward look healthy enough not to have to stay here any longer. Ed has got a very mild cold and with small doses of antibiotics, he should be fine. I have talked to Esme and my son and we all agree that it is in your best interest to be monitored for the next few days. If Edward gets worse then I want one of us to be there to help. The same goes with you. Your father has agreed for the both of you to stay at our house until after school next Monday."

"Edward already told me. It's fine with me."

Raising an eyebrow round at his son, he replied with a simple 'good' before turning back to me.

"There is something else that I need to talk to you about first."

He turned to Edward and nodded towards the door. Standing slowly, I gave him a small smile as he left the room.

"I understand that you never breast fed Edward."

"No. I wasn't comfortable at first and then my breasts dried up."

It was a little awkward for me to talk to him about this.

"I think Edward would benefit from breast feeding. He doesn't get all of the nutrients he could otherwise. If it's something you're willing to try, I can prescribe you some calcium pills which will stimulate your milk supply. It should take about three or four days to take effect and after you won't need to take them. Is that something you would want to do?"

I watched my little baby in my arms suckling on my finger for a while. I wanted what was best for him. It may be uncomfortable for me at first, but I couldn't help but want him to feed from my breasts.

"I could give it a go. I'd rather start sooner than later."

"Okay."

He seemed happy at my answer.

"Your father is waiting to see you. And when you're finished Edward can drive you to our house. I hope you don't mind, but Esme has packed a small bag of things for you in hopes of you agreeing to coming. She also got a bag together for Edward. Everything you or he would need is at our house."

"Thank you Carlisle."

"It's fine Bella. You are family now."

He leaned in to give me a hug and carefully maneuverer around Ed. Once he was out the door, I didn't have to wait long before my father came in. We talked for a while. Quietly, he fussed and worried about me and his grandson. He didn't want to disturb us for long in fear of me becoming tired. I didn't mind so much. When he left, Edward came in and placed a bag at the end of the bed. Lifting Ed into his arms, he pecked my lips quickly and left the room. I changed into some of my own clothes and brushed my hair out. I'd need to have a shower soon. I'm sure Esme would direct me to the shower when I got to their house. With the bag in hand, I stepped out of the hospital room. Making my way along the hall, I got to the waiting room. Edward was sitting in a quiet corner with my beautiful son in his arms. He stood up and wrapped one of his arms around my waist.

"I'll sign you out."

He handed me Ed and led me over to the receptionist. She was young and flirted with Edward. I was a little annoyed, but Edward wound his free arm around me waist, pulling me closer to him. After signing some papers, I signed my own name at the bottom. He pressed his lips to the top of my head. Carlisle stepped into the room and handed me a pot of pills. With some instructions and a goodbye from him, Edward gently pulled me out into the freezing cold. Holding Ed close to my chest, Edward opened the passenger door for me. He buckled me into the seat, his lips hovering by mine. Before he closed the door, he pecked my lips.


	14. New Home

**New Home**

The drive was longer than I thought as we moved passed the Forks boarder. Up a long, winding driveway he pulled into a large clearing. Snow was still covering the ground; it must have continued falling over the weekend. In the middle of the clearing was a tall, restored Victorian house. It was three stories high and very wide. The front door was on top of a wooden porch in the middle of the house. To one side there was only wall. On the other side was a long window. I couldn't see inside from here, but I assumed it was the living room. Edward pulled up outside and cut the engine. Unbuckling my seatbelt, I waited as he came around to my side. He held my waist as I stepped from the car with my baby in my arms.

"So, this is where I live. What do you think?"

"It's beautiful."

Shivering in the cold, I turned my head to sneeze lightly. Edward frowned and wrapped his arms around me.

"Let's get you inside Bella. I don't want your cold to get worse."

He placed his hand on the base of my spine causing a shiver to run up my spine. I allowed his hand to guide me up the steps and into the beautiful house. We were standing in a big entryway. There were no lights on but there was a lot of light in the room. From what I could see of the living room, there was a wall of windows which allowed the natural light inside. In front of us was a staircase with more glass running along one side. Edward slipped his shoes off and took Ed into my arms, so I could do the same. Leaving them by his, I reached back out for my son. With him nestled against my chest, I followed Edward through a door. We were in the kitchen. It was just as modern as the rest of the house with all the latest technology. Esme was stood behind the counter, cooking. She looked up and smiled when she saw me.

"Bella, I'm so glad you agreed to stay with us this week. Anything you need, just tell me okay. I want you and Ed to be as comfortable as possible."

"Thank you Esme. I don't want to impose on you or your family though."

"You won't be Bella. We all want to help you. I must say though, Rosalie formed a bit of an attachment to Ed when she was calming him down on Friday."

"I'll make sure that she keeps her distance. Bella's here to rest."

Edward leaned against the counter beside me grinning. I smiled and looked over my shoulder. When I was certain none of his family were around I turned back around.

"I told Edward. I don't want anyone else to know though."

She seemed really surprised at my confession. Edward wrapped an arm around my shoulder in comfort.

"That was very brave of you Bella."

"Edward's been a great friend to me and I trust him. He loves Ed and I thought it was the right time to tell him."

I pecked the top of my son's head and smiled widely. Whenever I talk about him and now Edward, I can't stop the smile on my lips. We stood in silence for a while; Esme got back to her cooking whilst Edward played with my hair. His sister then came into the room. Alice.

"Oh. Hello Bella."

"Hi."

Edward stepped back a little but was still partly in front of me.

"Bella, this is…"

"Alice. I can introduce myself Edward. I can tell that Bella and I will be great friends."

"No shopping Alice. Not this week."

He amended his comment when Alice looked put out. I couldn't help but smile. I'd missed out on having a sibling when growing up. It was nice to see their interaction.

"Fine. I will be taking you shopping soon though Bella. From what I've seen, you definitely need some new clothes."

Blushing, I looked away in embarrassment. I knew my clothes weren't new or nice. They were mostly worn but I had no money to go shopping. Everything I have goes towards my son.

"Plus, I've never been shopping for a baby before. Your brother is going to look so cute when I've finished with him."

I pressed my lips together and stepped around Edward.

"Alice, this is my brother Edward. It might be easier calling him Ed or there may be some confusion."

She came closer and clasped her hands together.

"He's so cute. Looks a lot like you Bella."

"I know."

"Can I hold him?"

I took a little step back, scared by her excitement. She frowned and dropped her arms. Edward stood beside me and placed one of his hands over mine.

"Maybe another time Alice."

Nodding her head, she moved backwards with a small smile on her face.

"Okay."

Edward turned to me and wound an arm around me.

"Let me show you to your room for the time being Bella. You shouldn't stay standing for too long. Do you want to feed Ed? He'll need to feed soon anyway."

"Yes please."

"I'll see you later Bella."

Alice piped up round her brother.

"Bye."

I followed Edward back to the front hall and up the stairs. We carried on past the first floor to the top of the house. There was only one door up here. He opened the door. The room was big. It was light and airy; a wall of glass making the room a natural brightness. There was a big king-sized bed against the wall facing the forest. Between it though was a beautiful wooden crib. I could tell that this was a regularly used bedroom.

"Whose room is this?"

I moved inside and turned around to him."

"Mine. But I agreed with my Mom that it would be best for you to have my room. You get the whole floor to yourself so there's more privacy for you both. I'm taking the spare room in the basement."

"I can take the basement. You shouldn't give your room up for me."

"Bella. I don't mind. You are our guest. I wouldn't ever let you sleep anywhere but the best room in the house. Now come on, I think its time you lay down for a while. Look, Ed's already falling asleep."

Standing on my tippy toes, I pecked his lips. He wound both arms around my waist and deepened the kiss. His lips moulded to mine as he slowly walked me backwards. Lifting one arm to support Ed, he sat me down on his soft mattress. He sat beside me, tilting my head up. The kiss wasn't like what we'd done earlier; it was rougher, more desperate. I was scared. The last time I was kissed like this, it was a bad evening. Pushing him away, I hit his chest until he moved away from me.

"I'm sorry Bella. I don't know what came over me."

"Please, I just… it wasn't your fault."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

He didn't push me. Instead, he tilted his head and softly pressed his lips to mine. It was a brief kiss but held love and passion all the same. I grinned when he pulled away. Playing with a strand of my hair, he stared into my eyes. He stood up and took my hand in his. Leading me over to the crib, he placed my hand on the smooth wood. With an arm around my side and resting over my stomach, he stood by myside. We both looked down at my baby. He placed his lips to my shoulder before laying his chin on my shoulder.

"You are such a great mother Bella. You have no idea how much I wish that Ed is my own son. Anyone who has you for a mother is so lucky. So kind, caring, generous. You always put your son before yourself. I'm going to be the one to put you first."

"Why?"

Tears had formed in my eyes and I turned my head towards him.

"I love you Bella. You are oh so perfect. A young mother raising her adorable son whilst getting an education. I have never met anyone as amazing as you. Please let me love and protect you."

He placed his lips to mine and sighed. His arm cupping Ed in my arms, he sucked my bottom lip into his mouth. I moaned lightly against him. Not pushing me too far, he pulled away. He guided my hands down to the crib so that Ed was lying down. He'd already fallen asleep and was resting peacefully. We watched my baby for a moment before he took my hand and pulled me back to his bed. Lifting me bridal style he lay me under the comforter and sat beside me. I tangled my fingers with his as he pressed his lips to my forehead. He started humming. A soft melody floated around me, calming every part of my mind and body. My eyes fluttered closed and he ran his fingers through my hair. The tips of his fingers brushed against my scalp, soothing me. I was so tired despite sleeping for the last few days. I couldn't stop the sleep consuming me now.


	15. Late at Night

**Late At Night**

After waking up only an hour after falling asleep, I fed my baby. He fell asleep again and I lay him down in the crib. Edward then came in and took me down for dinner. The meal was delicious, but everyone seemed unnaturally quiet. We all moved into the living room after. Esme sat on my one side, Edward on the other. Emmett slid a DVD into the flat screen TV. It was a little scary. Whenever I got scared I hid my face in his shoulder. By the time the movie had finished, I was curled up on Edward's lap, my head lying limp on his shoulder. His fingers combed through my hair sending me to sleep.

"Let's get you to bed sweetheart."

Too tired to move myself, Edward slipped his arms around me and lifted me up. The others whispered goodnights, but I was too close to sleep to be able to respond. When we got to his room that I was staying, I had gone through that state of being unconscious for a moment. I was then conscious enough to feel him lowering me into the bed. He went to move away from me, but I reacted almost instinctively and gripped his shirt. Freezing, he waited for what I would do next.

"Stay."

My voice was just a wisp through the air and his breath fanned out over me. Making his mind up, he lifted the comforter and climbed in next to me. I curled into him as he wrapped his arms around my waist. The night air was cold, but his body was so warm. It wasn't long before I was in a deep sleep.

A sharp cry pierced through the still air and I shot up. Dazed and confused by my surroundings, it finally registered with that I was in the Cullen household. My baby boy was across the room screaming in pain. Edward started to stir beside me and as his eyes fluttered open, I leapt from the bed and scooped my baby into my arms tightly. Taking the stairs carefully, I cooed to Ed and he quieted a little. In the kitchen I started to prepare a warm bottle of milk with some of his medicine. Just as Ed started suckling on the bottle, Edward and Esme came running into the room. Turning one of the dimmer lights on, I could see their panicked yet exhausted faces. Edward stepped towards me and held my elbow as I stared down at my son. Rose and Carlisle then entered the room. Seeing the situation was being controlled, he stood beside his wife with his arm around her shoulders. It was Rose that came over and got too close for my liking. Stepping away from her, I turned a glare on her. My son was in a vulnerable position. He only liked it when I was that close to him. She was shocked at first before her own dagger-ous eyes bore into me. Folding her arms over her chest, she glared down at me.

"Is he okay Bella?"

"Yes. He'll be fine. I'm sorry he woke you."

Esme moved round the centre counter but kept her distance.

"Nonsense Bella. It can't be helped. As long as Ed is fine then it doesn't matter."

She pressed down on the kettle and the water stared boiling. Carlisle smiled reassuringly at me and sat behind the counter.

"Is there anything I can get you Bella? A coffee? Something to eat?"

"No thank you Esme. I think I'll just take Ed back upstairs. I am really sorry for disturbing everyone's sleep."

"Don't worry about it Bella."

Making my way back up to Edward's room, I watched my baby drinking at the smooth milk. When the bottle was dry, I held Ed over my shoulder and gently patted his back. After burping him, his eyes closed over, drowsy from his drink. Cradling him into my arms, he fell asleep instantly. I lay in the huge bed with my son nestled just below the pillows. I wasn't all that tired but knew I would be soon. With my arm circling my baby protectively, my eyes fluttered closed. Soothing sounds helped guide me to sleep along with soft touches to my head.

The morning light streamed through the windows. I blinked several times, becoming used to the light. I was alone in Edward's big room. My son was gone from the bed. Movement in the bathroom drew my eye across to it. The door opened, and Edward stepped out. He was dressed in fresh black jeans that hugged his ass tightly. His shirt was pure white and showed off his strong biceps. He'd combed through his hair just enough for it to be an organised mess. Taking one glance to me, he smiled and came over.

"Morning sweetheart. I'll be heading to school soon."

"Can't you stay with me?"

"Not today Bella. Esme will be here all day."

He climbed into the bed and pulled me into his chest. Pecking my lips, he combed through my hair.

"I want you to get some more sleep. You look so tired still."

"I'm fine."

"No you aren't. When I come back after school, I want you to have had plenty of rest. You're here to have a break from everything and to get to a better place. Don't worry about anything."

"You are amazing Edward. Did you know that?"

"Not as amazing as you sweetheart."

He lowered his lips to mine and started a slow, loving kiss. I moaned against his lips and cupped his cheek. Wrapping his arms around my torso, he held my body to his. When he pulled away, he pressed his lips to my forehead.

"I have to go."

"Okay."

"I took Ed down to Esme this morning because he woke up when I did. I didn't want him disturbing you so took him down to Mom."

"Thank you."

"I'll see you later sweetheart. I love you."

"See you later."

He pecked my lips before grabbing his leather jacket and leaving. It was going to be a long day. That much I knew.


	16. Feeding

**Feeding**

Staying at the Cullen's was great. Only Esme was home during school and I felt a little lonely without seeing Edward all day. But as soon as he got home he would sit with me on the couch, his arm thrown round my shoulders. Alice would come and join us after a while. I liked her. At times she's a little scary but I know that she means no harm. It's difficult adjusting sometimes.

Carlisle hadn't allowed me back at school, but I was happy with the break. I could sleep in after the late nights up with my son. We got some personal quality time together that we didn't when I had school. His first tooth was so very close to coming through and it only made his pain that much worse. I held him to me whenever he was in pain and it seemed to calm him somewhat. The connection we had was unlike anything else.

I'd been taking the calcium pills Carlisle had given me every morning and he'd suggested I try feeding tonight. For some reason I'd put it off. Twice I'd gone upstairs with Ed for his feeding time but come back down to make a bottle. Esme gave me encouraging smiles every time, but I couldn't. I wasn't ready just yet. I knew that Ed could sense my nerves and fears and that made him worried and uncomfortable.

Laying on the couch with my son in my arms had become my day. Esme refused to let me do anything around the house. My cold had cleared up and Ed's had started to as well. There were still traces of snow outside, some of it having melted. The front door opened, and Edward and his siblings came in. He dropped his bag and came straight over to me.

"Hello sweetheart. Did you have a good day today?"

"Yeah. I missed you."

His family had found out about our relationship in the late hours of Monday evening. They'd grown used to me and Ed being there and had welcomed us to the family with open arms. So when he leaned down and pecked my lips they just smiled warmly.

"I missed you too."

Sitting me up, he sat beside me with his arms supporting Ed in my arms.

"Have you tried feeding him today?"

"Not yet. I'm a little scared."

We were whispering between us. His siblings still didn't know that Ed was my son and I didn't want them to know. I was happy with the way everything was going at the moment.

"Next time he needs feeding, would you like to give it a try? I'll be right outside the door for you."

"I could give it a try now. Ed was fed about an hour and a half ago, but he needs more milk what with his teeth."

"Come on then."

I followed Edward up the stairs to his room. He hadn't slept in the basement once since I'd got here. I'd been cuddled up with him every night in his bed. We hadn't done anything though. We kissed for a while and he tried to take it a step further once. He'd slipped his hand under my shirt. I'd coward away from him and he stopped. I was terrified of any form of contact like that. Kissing was safe. I couldn't be hurt when kissing.

Sitting me down on the edge of his bed, he made sure I was comfortable. He whispered comforting words into my ear before peppering my face with kisses.

"Take your time. There's no need to rush. I'll sit just on the other side of the door. If you need me just shout."

"Thank you."

After placing his smooth lips to mine he left the room. I was alone with my baby. The fears that I'd felt earlier when preparing were lessened now. Edward's support helped me a lot. Laying my son on the bed, I unclipped my bra and pulled it out from under my loose fitting shirt. I released my breasts from the neckline of my shirt. They definitely looked a little more swollen than usual. Lifting Ed back into my arms, I held him near my breasts. I'd gotten further now than I had earlier. I had to let Ed become comfortable with the new situation.

"It's okay baby. I'm going to feed you with my own milk for the first time."

Reaching his fingers out, he touched my soft skin. I let him suck on my thumb for a few moments. His lips were so close to my nipple and he didn't seem fazed by the new position. He dropped my thumb from his mouth and moved across to my pert nipple. His lips fell a couple of times, so I shifted him slightly. The feeling was strange at first. When he was secured against my breast, I could feel my milk releasing from my nipple. Ed seemed so content lying against my chest. His eyes were closed and his fingers resting over the side of my breast above where his mouth was. I grinned watching him. If I had known the joys of breastfeeding I would have started a long time ago. Cradling him to me like this made me feel more like a mother than anything else. I hid my free breast he wasn't suckling on beneath my t-shirt and brushed my hair out of my face.

"Edward?"

"Yes Bella. Are you okay?"

"Come in Edward."

There was a silence before I heard the door handle turning and the door was opened. Edward stood watching me with his eyes filled with an emotion I couldn't pinpoint. Patting the spot beside me, I asked him with my eyes to sit. He stumbled slightly as he came over to me. He'd never done that before. Sitting beside me, he wound his arm behind me, his hand cupping my son. His other hand brushed across my cheek. I turned my head to his and was so close to him.

"You, my sweetheart, are beautiful."

Cupping the back of my neck, he pressed his lips to mine. I became like jelly instantly. With my baby suckling on my breast and Edward kissing my lips, I had never felt so loved before. My lips were moulded to his perfectly. I didn't want it to end. But he did pull his lips from mine an inch.

"I envy your son so much right now Bella."

His lips were back on mine, sucking on my bottom lip. I moaned lightly into his mouth and sighed.

"He gets to latch onto your perfect rounded mounds. My sweetheart, I love you."

"Mmmm Mmmm…"

Softly at first, he ran his tongue around my lips. Parting my lips, he cautiously flicked his tongue out. The sweet taste of his tongue filled my mouth. I moaned louder this time. His confidence grew as he massaged the top of my tongue with his. When I needed to breathe, his lips slid down to my neck. Nipping at my skin, he nuzzled his head into the crook between my neck and shoulder. Ed let go of my nipple and yawned widely. Lifting him up over my other shoulder, I patted his back lightly. He didn't take long to burp. I left Edward's embrace much to his disappointment. After laying my sleepy baby in the crib, I straddled Edward's lap. He took hold of the back of my thighs and fell backwards. I placed my hands on his shirt covered pecks.

"I love you Bella. So much."

"I love you too Edward."

It was the first time I'd said it. I finally felt confident enough to say those words. I'd never said them to anyone before. I trusted Edward with my life. He lay with his head against the bed, his eyes closed.

"Say it again Bella."

Leaning forwards, my lips ghosted over his.

"I love you."

He groaned and caught my lips in a passionate kiss. It was slow, loving and tender; nothing like anything I'd experienced before. My life was going perfectly. There was nothing more I could ask for. I'd found the love of my life and had the most amazing son. Everyone around me offered support. Moving to Forks was the best idea ever. I'm so glad my mother had suggested it. My future looked bright and I knew that with Edward by my side there was no chance of darkness taking over me.


	17. Epilogue

**Hey guys,**

 **I am so happy everyone has enjoyed this story. I have loved writing it. But I've had some really bad writer's block this week. I just couldn't see where I should take the story next. But I couldn't leave the story there, there were too many unanswered questions. So here is a little epilogue to give a glimpse into their lives in the future.**

 **-x-**

 **iwishiwherebellaswan**

 **xxx**

* * *

 **Five Years Later**

I sat watching my son running around with his father.

After graduating High School, with a lot of support from the Cullen's, Edward and I went to Baylor University with my little Ed. We shared a two bed apartment, Edward and I in one room, the other having been transformed into a nursery. The only father Ed had ever known was Edward and I couldn't be happier. As I had taken a three year course, I spent Edward's final year staying home with Ed. Part way through the year, I got a job writing for a small newspaper. It meant going into the offices three times a week, but I arranged it so that Edward could be home with Ed. The three of us had little time to go back to Forks to see our families, but Esme often came to visit. But it was the fourth of July and Edward had graduated so we'd gone back to Forks. His family were all gathering home for holidays and I wanted to be there with them.

Esme and I were sitting together on the long picnic bench in the middle of their yard. Rosalie was standing with Jasper, cradling her new born baby in her arms. It turned out Rose had always wanted children. Her and Emmett got married their first year of College and had their first baby nine months later. Now, they have three children; Chad is 4, Madison is 3 and little Russell is just 1 month old. Alice and Jasper married just after Chad was born and now have a 2 year-old daughter. Even my Dad remarried and was happy. Looking around at everyone playing in the yard, I realised that my life wasn't all that different from five years ago. Everyone had moved on, but I was still stuck in the past. Edward wanted to move on. He'd proposed before, but I said no as there were still things he didn't know about me.

Climbing out from the bench, I made my way over to my boyfriend and son. Edward stood up straight and smiled across at me, completely unaware of how I was feeling. Ed ran over to me and leapt into my arms.

"Are you going to play with us Mommy?"

"Not right now sweetie. Will you go and play with Chad? I want to talk to Daddy for a minute."

"Okay."

He scrambled down from my arms and ran over to where Chad was playing with his toy trucks. Taking Edward's hand, I started to pull him inside. He followed me closely, not saying anything. I pushed him down onto his old bed from High School and sat beside him. He wound one arm around my back, holding me to his side.

"It's time I tell you about Ed's father."

It was something he'd asked me about before. But I'd never been able to talk about it with him.

"It was after the new year in 2012. I hadn't gone back to school yet. I'd spent the day in the mall with my friends. We were celebrating the new year. We went to dinner in the evening and were having a good time. My mom wasn't expecting me home. She knew I'd text her when I was leaving, so she went to bed when it got late. When the restaurant was closing, my friend offered me a ride home, but I lived in the opposite direction to the other girls she was driving home. I didn't mind. I'd got the bus home late in the evening before. It wasn't something I hadn't done before. So I texted my Mom letting her know I'd be home in about half an hour."

Taking a deep breath, I leaned into him.

"I had to walk four blocks to the bus stop, but I never reached it. I was attacked and raped and left lying in the street."

Edward's hands on my tightened and he sucked in a deep breath.

"It took almost an hour before a couple came across me. They called an ambulance and I was taken into hospital. I don't remember anything that happened over the next few days, what I do know is what my Mom told me. But I do remember the feeling. I was unresponsive, so I couldn't tell anyone what happened to me, but because of the way couple described finding me, the doctors did a rape kit. When the tests came back positive, the police were called. They couldn't do anything at the time. I couldn't give them a description of the man and the DNA they'd retrieved from my body didn't match anyone on their system. But it matched with an unidentified piece of DNA from a different rape victim. When I eventually was told that information, I felt a little better knowing I wasn't the only one. I stayed off school for almost a month, but I often had friends staying over because I didn't like being alone. Everyone was very nice and sympathetic. The police called my Mom everyday to ask if I was ready to go into the station and give a statement, but I couldn't remember anything about the man and I was scared. Eventually I went back to school. I didn't like being around guys, even the ones who were my friends. My girl friends were all really good at surrounding me so that they couldn't get close to me. It was about two months after that I found out I was pregnant. My Mom insisted I go for weekly check ups and blood tests, and that's how I found out. Within two days, everyone at school turned against me. Someone thought I'd made the whole story up and just got knocked up for the attention. I had a few good friends that stayed by my side. But not many. Summer break was tough. I didn't leave my house except from when I had a doctor's appointment. And then Ed was born on the first of September. I never told you this, but I'd gone through the process of giving Ed up for adoption. I was scared he'd look like his father and I couldn't deal with that. There was a couple ready to take him from me. But when he was born, he looked so beautiful. I fell in love with him the first time I saw him. School was rough though. I was bullied relentlessly. There were times I'd be out in the park with Ed and people would start throwing things at us. I was too scared to go to school, so I'd stay home. I didn't know what to do. It was over the Christmas break, when Charlie was visiting, my Mom suggested that I move to Forks with Charlie, start over with Ed. I cried that night, but unlike all the other nights, it was because I was so happy. So I moved to Forks."

Closing my eyes, I stopped talking. Edward didn't say anything for a minute, but he continued to hold me. Turning his head towards mine, I felt his lips on my temple.

"I am so sorry Bella. I wish none of that happened to you."

"I don't. Not anymore. If it hadn't happened, I wouldn't have Ed. I've gotten past what happened to me. And I'm hoping that telling you this will let me move on with my life. With our life."

"Thank you, Bella, for telling me."

He lifted me onto his lap and held me close to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, smiling up at him.

"Do you see me any differently now?"

He sighed, his hand sliding over my thigh.

"Yes. What happened to you explains a lot. And I completely understand. I don't love you any less and I respect every decision you've made as they were made to better your life and Ed's. And now we've built a family together, you, Ed and me. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, as I always have been. If you ever have anything else to tell me, I am here to listen."

"I know. Seeing the others outside, I realised that I want us to be like that. I want us to be able to move forwards together. Rose and Emmett have Chad, Madison and Russell, Alice and Jasper have Cami and are expecting again. I want to have a baby with you."

Sliding my hand over his face, I stared into his deep green eyes. He was stunned. We'd never talked about having a baby together. We've had a lot going on in the last five years and we've been trying to raise Ed as best we can. And Edward is Ed's father. They may not share blood, but they are father and son. I make sure everyone knows it when they ask. But in the last few months, I'd been thinking about what Ed would look like if Edward was his biological father.

Brushing his hair out of his eyes, I placed my other hand to his chest. Tilting my head back, I pressed my lips to his.

"I want us to have a baby together and expand our family. Ed, he's nearly six, and he's starting kindergarten in the fall. You've got your new job and I've still got the paper. I know we haven't had sex in a while, but that's not because I don't want to. Ed's always found a way of interrupting. But we'll have a couple hours each day when Ed's at kindergarten. I want us to use that time to be together. I know you'll be working most days, but I can bring you lunch, and when you're at home, we can spend some quality time together."

"Bella, I… I think you need to slow down a minute. I would love to have a baby with you, but is now really the right time? Our apartment isn't big enough for another baby. There's barely enough space for Ed now that he's getting bigger."

"I know. But we always knew we weren't going to live in our apartment much longer after you graduated. And we could have the baby in our room until we find somewhere else."

"You've thought about this a lot, haven't you?"

"Yes. And we'll make it work. We always do."

"Yes, we do work well together, don't we?"

He turned me around on his lap so that my knees were on either side of him. Placing my hands to his shoulders, I leaned over him.

"I've never felt safer than here in your arms, in this room. I remember the first time I was in here. It was the first time I felt safe after everything happened."

"I watched you sleep that night. You were so tired and when you leapt out of bed to go to Ed, god, you were amazing."

Sliding his hands onto my ass, he flipped me over onto my back, my head resting in the pillows.

"We've never had sex in here."

"No."

He opened my legs around his hips and slid up my body. Pushing at his shoulders, he rolled off me.

"We haven't, and we aren't going to either. Not now at least."

Sitting up, I pressed my lips to his.

"I love you."

"I love you too Bella."

I climbed out of the bed and held my hand out to him.

"I want to start life with you Edward."

"Then let's start."

 **The End**


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